We』re lucky to live in a country with one of the greatest natural resources in the free world. I』m talking about, of course, comedians.
We have more comedy icons, per capita, than any other nation in the world. From past legends like Groucho Marx and Lenny Bruce to modern-day masters of comedy like Chris Rock and David Letterman, their pithy observations on modern life is what keeps us sane, and reminds us that laughter will always be the best medicine. Here are fifty jokes from some of our greatest comedy icons. For more laughs, check out these 30 Times Famous People Dissed Other Celebs In Hilarious Ways.
「Proof that we don』t understand death is that we give dead people a pillow.」 And for more laughs, check out 30 Funniest Memes of All Time.
「I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boss was trying to say? 『Hey, if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.'」 And for more from comedy legend Chris Rock, check out the 30 Funniest Pieces of Celebrity Relationship Advice.
「Do you know what I love most about baseball? The pine tar, the resin, the grass, the dirt. And that’s just in the hot dogs.」 And for more on hot dogs, find out The 9 Best Greasy Food Meccas to Visit Before You Die.
「I don』t like country music, but I don』t mean to denigrate those who do. And for those who like country music, denigrate means to 『put down.'」 For more great country music zingers, check out the 30 Funniest Lines From Country Songs.
「I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.」 And for more funny one-liners, read up on 25 Monty Python One-Liners That Are Still Relevant Today.
「Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.」 Oof! And to keep the fun going, don』t miss this hilarious roundup of the 40 Funny Things Everyone Has Secretly Done.
「The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how much I play, I』ll never be as good as a wall. I played a wall once. They』re relentless.」 And for more great jokes, check out the 50 Knock Knock Jokes Guaranteed to Crack You Up.
